Mad cow disease

Kid: It looks like the mad cow disease is spreading Dad?

Man: It's not mad cow disease, they're cow-crazy (to become crazy about making money from cows)!

Calls are mounting for anti-graft investigators to broaden the investigation into the beef import corruption case that has embroiled the Justice & Prosperity Party amid new claims that the scandal reaches as high as the presidency.

Kompas - September 7, 2013

Food import cartels

Businessmen: Ah, absolutely delicious

Man: Duh, very bitter and hard

According to the country's top anti-corruption agency, the government's poor management of commodities has created loopholes resulting in the creation of food import cartels seeking to control the market through speculation and price fixing resulting in both scarcity and high prices for basic food staples.

Kompas - September 4, 2013

Authentic soya sauce

Man: Authentic soya sauce yeah Mr? (bottle reads 'The No 1 Authentic Soya Sauce', badge reads 'Presidential Candidate')

Kid: But soybeans are scarce and expensive!

Popular food staples tempeh and tofu have virtually disappeared from traditional markets due to soybean shortages and souring prices caused by price fixing and hoarding by food import cartels. There seems to be no scarcely however of presidential hopefuls all branding themselves as the most authentic and tasty candidate on the market.

Kompas - August 31, 2013

Panjat Pinang

Prizes read (clockwise): 2014 elections, high prices, security forces shootings, weakening rupiah, riots, oil and gas corruption.

Panjat Pinang, a traditional celebration of Indonesia's Independence Day on August 17 that dates back to Dutch colonial days, involves contestants being challenged to scale slippery betel nut tree trunk placed vertically in the ground with a wheel full of prizes at the top.

Kompas - August 21, 2013

So now please forgive

Politician: Last year's Lebaran is over. So now please forgive my physical and emotional wrongdoings (a traditional Idul Fitri greeting) once again...

While the political elite like make a big show of observing the rituals of the Idul Fitri celebrations at the end-of-Ramadan holiday period, it is little more than an exercise in polishing their public image as they prepare to get on with what they do best – robbing the country blind.

Kompas - August 7, 2013